The theme for the past couple of weeks has been healing through thoughts, meditation, and self-care. In continuing this I want to discuss the importance of truly feeling the emotions, “good” and “bad”, in order to heal–heal your thoughts, heal your mind, and
heal your body. So often we run from those feelings that are construed as “bad”–anger, sadness, frustration, anxiety, etc. But who says these feelings are “bad”, and why? Are emotions ever really wrong? Sure, when you bottle these feelings up and ignore them that’s when it can become problematic because if triggered, those feelings can bubble to the service and cause pain (emotional and/or physical) and releases the stress hormones throughout your body, which can cause an array of other physical and mental problems. What would it look like instead if in the moment that anger, frustration, anxiety, or sadness hit us and we stopped and allowed ourselves to truly feel that? What if someone you cared about said something that hurt you and instead of either taking it or lashing out you stopped and allowed your body to feel those words and feelings? What would happen? You would probably have a physical reaction–crying, shaking, or simply bowing your head–and you would probably want to lash out and defend yourself. But, sitting with that feeling, even for a moment, brings you back to the present and gives yourself the awareness of what is going on within you so you can voice that accurately to this person who has hurt you. In being aware it allows you to slow down and be conscious with your response. You can be a model for that person and allow them to see your vulnerability, which in turn may open up their vulnerability.
The word “vulnerability” opens up a lot of fear too because in being vulnerable you’re truly being human. It’s easy to sit behind a screen and post pictures of a seemingly perfect life. As a species we look at vulnerability as weak, but really being vulnerable opens us up to compassion, empathy, and authenticity. In being authentic and vulnerable you are more open to truly feeling, which can either prevent future trauma or heal past trauma.
Now, many of us have those past traumas that need healing. Sure, we can encounter the scenario above, but even before that it’s essential to start working on the healing process now so you are better equipped to handle the above scenario or something similar. So, how do we go about this? Meditation is a wonderful tool to start the feeling to healing process. Feelings are energy, therefor they never stay the same. Energy constantly moves and changes, so too do your feelings. Instead of running from these feelings, this energy, immerse yourself in them. This can seem intimidating and scary, but remember, nothing stays the same. Feelings change. If going into the trauma, “negative” feelings seems scary, try with “good” feelings first. For example, take a shower and really feel the water on you. Feel what sensations you have on your skin, your hair, your face. Next, close your eyes and feel what emotions come up as you shower–calm, relaxation, maybe joy–and allow that energy to flow through your body. Now notice the sensations along your skin, within your muscles, and within your mind. What do you feel? How long does this last? What do the emotions change to? (Even if the changes are subtle, what are they?). As you get out of the shower you may notice a change either physically or mentally, but you may also notice those feelings may no longer be present. That’s because the energy is constantly changing.
Now, for the trauma, for those feelings we all run from. Close your eyes and see yourself sitting under a large tree. Notice your breathing. Is it deep or shallow? Start to deepen your breath–breathe deep into your belly, up through your chest, to your throat, all the way to the top of your head and exhale it all out. Continue this for at least three more rounds. Once you’ve completed that third round come back to your normal breath. Focus on that feeling you’ve been running from. See its energy course through your body like a beam of light. Allow your body to react. Allow your mind to react as you feel this feeling. As this continues see another beam of light shoot down through the top of your head and through each chakra (energy center) and then shoot out like nerves in your body. See the light grow hooks on the ends and grab onto your feeling, your thought that you’ve been running from. See the feelings and thoughts merge with this calming light you’ve welcomed within you. See them integrate and change into healthy thoughts and feelings of joy, gratitude, and peace. Feel yourself as a part of the divine light and know that you are connected to that light and whenever you need it, it will come instantaneously. Sit with this calmness, this new energy, this changed energy. Feel. Open your eyes.
Remember, we are here to experience life and truly feel. Feeling heals you and your trauma.